They Were Brothers
by ArmagonAuthor
Summary: A short one-shot taking place right after "Heaven and Hell." Sam considers why Dean would choose his life over Anna's even after all the times he's lied and ignored Dean's wishes, and is met with the truth behind his brother's sacrifice.


This insert takes place right after the episode "Heaven and Hell." It is just for angst and emotion, and is meant to be able to fit directly in between this and the next episode without changing the plot to come. Tell me if you like it, and please give me some more suggestions of episodes to do this with for the future.

This one is from Sam's point of view, but I do take requests on other characters.

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Sam pulled his dirty jeans off the hotel floor, shoving them in his suitcase along with everything else he owned. Behind him, Dean was doing the same. They had to leave quickly. Demons and angels both would be on their doorstep soon, wanting to finish the fight, and they had to run like hell.

They were both quiet and frankly, Sam wasn't sure what to say. Anna was gone, and anyone in a ten mile radius would be able to tell that Dean was heartbroken. It had all happened in such a short amount of time. Sam had been drunk – it was hard not to be lately, he admitted – when Ruby had told him about the girl who the demons were after, but he knew by her expression that it was for real.

The girl had been easy to find, taking refuge in her church from the demons chasing her, confused and alone. The second she had walked out into the light to look at them, it was like a switch had flipped. Dean had this look in his eyes that Sam had never seen when Dean had looked at any girl ever before. Normally it was simple for Dean; beer, lust, hot chicks. But Anna was different, that much was plain to see. She had looked at Sam first, curiosity in her eyes. "Sam… Sam Winchester?" She had seemed happy to hear that name, although cautious. In her defense, who knew what the angels had said about him?

But then she had turned to Dean. "And you're Dean… _the_ Dean." That had made Sam force back a smile. For once, Dean wasn't famous for his charm or his hunting skills or his car. He was famous for… well… for whatever the angels needed him for. Dean had smiled at Anna then shyly; a look that Dean never wore, and Sam knew it had started already. Dean had fallen hard.

Soon later, after Anna found out the truth with the help of Pamela the psychic; she was a fallen angel. Now _that_ one had stumped Sam. Wasn't fallen angel a phrase saved for songs of broken hearts and old love ballads? Weren't they the phrase used to describe Lucifer the devil? But no, it had all been true. This girl, this innocent, naïve girl who had stolen his brother's heart, was a fallen angel. And the angels had tried to kill her. Castiel and Uriel had tried to punish her for ripping out her grace, for wanting to be human. They had threatened to throw Dean back into the pit if they didn't give her up. And then, to Sam's dismay, they had offered Dean a decision. Sam or Anna, plain and simple. They were going to kill Sam if Dean didn't give Anna up. And stupid Dean had chosen his idiot brother over the woman who could literally save him from hell's clutches. Dean had loved her, but he had given her up just to save Sam. Again.

_So first you sacrifice your soul, then Anna's life for me? _Sam felt himself tense up as Dean reached by him to grab a t-shirt that had ended up on the bedside table. _Why do you care about me so much? I'm a horrible brother._

Sam hated to think it because deep in his heart he knew it wasn't true. He was a good brother. He put up with Dean's music and his extra onions and all the sleazy girls he brought home. But it would be a lie for Sam to deny all the things he had done lately to test Dean's friendship and trust. He had lied excessively about every little thing, like his drinking and his gambling and hooking up with Ruby. He ad told Dean that he never used his powers when he really had. He had thrown his life away when Dean had died, and now that he was back, it was hard to look himself in the eye lately, let alone Dean. When Dean had found out that Sam had been exorcising demons with his mind, he had been beyond pissed. Sam had been physically afraid, not that he would get the shit kicked out of him – although that seemed like a big possibility at the time – but that he would loose his brother, and forever this time.

"_If I didn't know you, I would want to hunt you…"_Sam's throat tightened just thinking about his brother's hurtful words, although he knew they had just been said in the heat of the moment. Dean hadn't been able to understand why Sam had lied, or why he had used his powers in the first place. How could he? Sam himself barely understood. All that he knew was that it had hurt so much to be alone, to know that Dean was burning in hell because of Sam, and that he had to find something to mask the pain. So yeah, he had turned to drinking, gambling, fighting. He had summoned countless demons to try and undo the deal Dean had made for him. He had and slept with Ruby. And he had even let her teach him how to use his powers to exorcise demons with his mind, a feat that he had promised himself he would never reach. Sam had done all this, and Dean had been angry as hell.

That was why it had been such a shock when Dean had chosen him over Anna. Poor, innocent little Anna. Who could blame her for pulling out her grace so she could be human? She wanted love, friendship, to be able to make mistakes and live life without rules. She had done all this, had brought light into Dean's life where Sam had failed. And Dean had torn himself to pieces letting her go just so Sam could live. _"They gave him a choice… Kill me, or kill you…_"Sam remembered Anna's brave words and sighed quietly to himself. Anna had made it out alive, thankfully. She had stolen her grace back and transformed back into a full-bodied angel. But who knew if they were ever going to see her again? That was very unlikely, considering the barriers between them now. Although Sam missed the girl, he knew she was better off now. He pitied his brother most of all.

"What?" Dean's voice was close, and Sam realized that he had worried his brother.

"Nothing…"Sam tried not to scoff. Dean looked like crap, and he was worried about _Sam_? Sam didn't feel that great – on the contrary, he felt like he was going to pass out – but he wasn't half as bad as Dean as far as he was concerned. Let Dean worry about himself for once. He grabbed his suitcase; back still turned to Dean, and went to put it in the car when Dean grabbed his arm.

"Common man, if anyone can tell when something's up, it's me." Dean looked worried, as usual. Sam hated how he could draw that much emotion from his brother without even doing anything.

"I'm fine," Sam pulled his arm away, giving Dean the cold shoulder as he made his way to the car. "Stop worrying about me." He meant it in more ways than one.

"Dude," Dean dropped his suitcase, frowning at Sam. "What's your problem?"

"I don't know…"Sam sighed angrily. " Why don't you ask Anna?"

Sam immediately cursed himself for something so hurtful, and his words were reworded with Dean cutting him off in the doorway with a glare. "Excuse me?"

"No-Nothing. I'm sorry," Sam pushed Dean's arm out of the way gently to get back in the room, and Dean shut the door behind him.

"You think I wanted this to happen Sam?" Dean gave Sam a scary-angry look, although it was justified. "You think I wanted to let them" –

"No…"Sam shook his head, looking down to ignore meeting Dean's eyes. " It's just" –

"Just what Sam? Should I have tried harder? Should I have let them throw me back in the pit or" –

"You shouldn't have chosen me Dean." Sam's voice was quiet as he finally looked up.

Dean's face softened, as if he finally understood. "Sam…"

"I mean, why _me_ Dean? Anna never did anything wrong. Dean…"Sam paused, frowning. "I know how you felt about her."

After hesitancy, Dean sighed. "No you don't."

"You don't think I can tell Dean? She had you in puppy love for god's sakes! I mean Dean… I owe you already. Not the other way around. Why would you even" –

"You don't owe me anything Sam," Dean cut off, his face set hard.

"How could you even say that Dean?" Sam bit the inside of his cheek, confused. "You were in hell… for forty years" –

"You don't think I don't know that?"

Sam nodded, looking down again. "Than how can you say that I don't owe you? Why would you choose my life over hers when you clearly loved her" –

"Because you're my brother Sam."

Dean was quiet, and Sam could feel him waiting to look up. He raised his head, finally meeting his brother's eyes. "So you… you don't want to, you know, hunt me or whatever?"

"Do I… _what_?"

" 'Sam if I didn't know you," Sam quoted, looking anywhere but Dean's eyes. "I would want to hunt you.' And so would other hunters." He waited for Dean's expression, and saw recognition and guilt across his face.

"Sam… I didn't" –

"Yeah you meant it," Sam interrupted, speaking honestly. "And I get it. I'm sorry I lied, and I'm sorry that I scared you. But I know that explaining myself isn't going to cut it anymore. I wish I would make you understand but I can't. And you" –

"I made a promise Sam" –

"That you would kill me if I went dark side. I know" –

"Let me finish." Dean's voice was soft, pleading, and Sam nodded slowly. "Look… I made a promise that I would _take care of you_. To dad, to you, and to myself. Your powers or whatever has nothing to do with whether you are my brother Sam. Yeah you piss me off sometimes and I piss you off too. But I'm not going to willingly let anything happen to you. Especially not to save someone else. Anna didn't deserve to die but you didn't need to take the fall for her. I'm not a reaper Sam. I can't decide things like that. And she lived by the way, so I think I made a damn good decision in my choice. "

Sam nodded, his hair falling in his face. "But Dean…"

"I've said my fill Sam. Let it go. There's … there's nothing we can do for now. At least until we get the hell out of here." Dean gave Sam a forced half smile, then turned around to grab his bag off the floor. " But if those demon's catch us for this, I'm so going to kick your ass."

"Uh huh Dean," Sam nodded, pretending to roll his eyes. "I'm sure you will."

"Oh I will Sam, don't think I wont." Dean turned the doorknob, throwing the bag over his shoulder.

"Dean?"

Hesitating with his hand on the door, Dean looked back to look at his brother.

"I just, uh… thanks." Sam cleared his throat, pretending to be casual, but his eyes portrayed a different message. "For everything."

Dean's eyes returned the look, although he smiled, throwing the door open and marching into the night. "Don't worry about it Sammy." He threw his bag into the Impala's trunk, shutting it with a firm slam. "What are brother's for?"

"Don't get all cheesy on me man," Sam opened his door and slid into the passenger's side.

"What can I say?" Dean slid into his own seat, shoving the key in the ignition and starting the engine with a roar. "You started it."

With that short Phrase, Sam turned back to look out the side window. Dean turned up the music, and they were back to their normal selves. Things weren't going to be easy, Sam knew. There would be deaths, sacrifices, more pain. They would both have to make hard choices. Sam would not have the last of the fight yet. But with Dean at his side, Sam knew he could take it. They were brothers.


End file.
